The Case of Missing Body Parts

Community service projects are the go-to for any company trying to promote goodwill in a community. My husband’s company is no different; they have done numerous beach clean-ups in the past. However, this year their team is working more inland, it would not be a day at the beach.  

This year, they all felt a little dread at having to muck about on a muddy riverbed in the early morning chill. He was leaving early; it was still dark. I could see the dread in the way he slowly put on his shoes. Barely 5 am, I felt bad for him … then pulled the blanket up, and fell back asleep.  

I texted mid-afternoon, after he was done. 

How did it go this morning? 

We pulled a lot of objects out of the river.

Is it a dumping ground? 

Yes. 

More typing dots. 

I waited. 

Just as my crime show-watching imagination started to activate, I received this: 

Gingerbread house, golf balls, pee bottles, mattresses, blankets, carts, boobs, and butts

My eyebrows raised, wondering what text-to-speech interpreted for boobs and butts. 

I texted back for clarification: I am sorry, boobs and butts? 

He was ready for me. The pictures were already loading:

I needed more info, and this is all I got. 

They pulled out a suitcase. 

I said: That gives me the chills. 

He agreed.  We were a little nervous to open the suitcase. Until the boobs and butts came spilling out of it. 

I wonder if this will make the annual report.